Why Your Older Kids Fight Your Teaching… and How To Fix That

Why Your Older Kids Fight Your Teaching … and How To Fix That - Tricia Goyer

Why Your Older Kids Fight Your Teaching… and How To Fix That

I’m a mom of six children. I’ve been homeschooling eighteen years, and now that I have three preschoolers, I have another eighteen years of homeschooling to go!

Three of my children are adults. Cory is 24 years old. He’s a working man and a caring husband and father. Leslie is 21 and graduated from the University of Arkansas, Little Rock, last year. She’s a stellar student who’s living in Europe as a missionary right out of college. Nathan is 20 years old and after one semester of college he was asked to work as a writing coach in the university’s writing center. Even more important than how well they’re doing in life, my three older kids love God and have a deep, growing relationship with him.

We also have three more kids ages 5, 3, and 2 who’ve been added to our family through adoption. As a 41-year-old mom, sometimes I’m overwhelmed with thinking of doing it ALL again, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s to focus on one day at a time. And focus on one heart at a time.

I started off by telling you of my older kids’ successes in education and life because I want you to know it is possible.

If you would have told me three years, five years, or seven years ago where my kids would end up, I would have been relieved—but confused. I often fought with my kids on getting their work done. They seemed unmotivated at times. Some (most?!) of their work was done half-heartedly, and there was one child who just could not “get” the read-the-book and answer-the-questions model.

There were many homeschooling days I found myself in tears. I prayed for God to give me the answer, and when it came it wasn’t what I expected. “Throw out the lesson plans and stop trying to force learning. Look at each child individually. Focus on that child’s heart, and teach to that child.”

“But what about geography and geometry and all those other critical subjects?” I prayed (and fretted.) Still, God kept the answer that He spoke to my heart the same…

(This article is continued on AmericanHomeEducators.org)


God, thank you for speaking when we need to hear your voice. Thank you for teaching us according to our personal learning styles. Teach us how to interact with those around us in ways that honor their brilliance and uniqueness in your kingdom.

Let’s play a game!The Kissing Bridge by Tricia Goyer

My book The Kissing Bridge is a featured item in Barnes & Noble through August 18th! Next time you’re at Barnes & Noble, snap a photo of the book and post it on social media with the hashtag #iSpyTriciaG – You’ll be entered to win a $25 Starbucks gift-card and 5-book prize pack!

Only those in the US are eligible to win. Keep your eyes peeled for the winner announcement on August 19th!



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  1. Thank you for sharing!

  2. Thank you for sharing your story.This gives me hope.



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