Don’t Give Up Too Soon on Your Marriage
It’s not our anniversary, but a good marriage is worth celebrating. And the thing is, there was a time when I felt my feelings fade.
It was a busy season of homeschooling two teens and a pre-teen. John was working hard and serving in ministry. I was writing lots of books.
It’s not like either of us did anything wrong, it’s just that we didn’t give to the other person like we needed to. I still cared for John, and he cared for me, but it wasn’t the same spark.
The Truth About Marriage
The truth is married life doesn’t often resemble the giddy, can’t eat, can’t sleep feelings of those first romances. And it was my writer friends/prayer warriors who I confessed this to … and they prayed me through it.
As I laid in bed that night after the prayer, I pictured Jesus with me during my high school years. I’d been looking for love and remembering fondly the THRILL of dating, of being chosen. But when I imagined Jesus there, I saw sadness in his gaze because He had so much for me. He knew that those high school sparks would leave me empty. Instead, John was waiting–someone that was not all flash and empty promises. God had someone dedicated, steady, and loving for me–the man I married. The man I’d become discontent with.
The next morning I awoke with a renewed love for my husband. I also started pouring into our relationship day-by-day. I loved John in ways he longed to be loved, and he did the same to me.
Where has love taken us?
Our love has pulled us together, and it’s made it possible for us to open our home to seven more kids. If we hadn’t stuck it out so many lives would have been changed.
I used to think that big, major blowups were the things that broke marriages apart. Now I know different. It’s the drifting. It’s longing for rushes of emotions while ignoring dedication, commitment, and unconditional love.
If you know a couple who is in that fizzle place please pass this on–don’t give up too soon on your marriage. Marriage is worth fighting for. Instead of stepping away, step closer … even if you’re afraid of being hurt. It’s worth it for the other person. It’s worth it for all the other people who your marriage will impact.
Our promise to “love, honor and cherish” is one I’m happy I kept.